November is National Family Caregiver Month. Oftentimes, people caring for others can suffer from exhaustion and burnout. “Caretakers are all too familiar with feelings of being stretched too thin from time to time as they nurture, support, and protect those they care for,” says mindfulness expert Julie Potiker, author of “SNAP! From Chaos to Calm. “Sometimes, they care so much that their empathy drains them completely.”
According to Potiker, when you start to feel tired or drained from giving, that’s empathy fatigue. The key to healing it lies in compassion. “The practice of Mindful Self-Compassion offers many tools we can use to overcome empathy fatigue in the present and help to prevent it in the future,” she says.
Here are five ways to recognize and beat empathy fatigue:
1. Don’t ignore fatigue. When you feel exhausted from caretaking, don’t ignore it. If you don’t acknowledge it and work to heal it, it can wreak havoc on your sense of wellbeing.
2. Add compassion to your empathy. When you add compassion to your empathy something beautiful happens: You help another person, and in return, you experience self-compassion.
3. Be a caretaker of YOU. The well-worn analogy of putting your own oxygen mask on first applies. If you don’t keep yourself healthy and well in body and mind, your ability to care for others will be severely compromised.
4. Schedule “you time.” Make time for mindful self-care. Take a few minutes for meditation each day. Take a nice hot bath. Call a friend. Take a walk and practice staying grounded by putting your attention on the soles of your feet. Listen to music that soothes and inspires you. Practice Loving Kindness meditation. Fill yourself back up with an abundance of caring.
5. Practice on-the-job self-compassion. Whether you’re caring for a loved one at home or in a care facility, do a quick check-in with yourself. Drop your awareness to the soles of your feet for a moment as you take three conscious breaths. Get centered in your body. Balancing empathy with compassion (for self and others) is crucial for avoiding empathy fatigue.
“As a caretaker, you should never resign yourself to just suffering your way through it when you’re tapped out,” says Potiker. “Mindful Self-Compassion is an effective and accessible way to acknowledge that your own wellness is crucial to your caretaking capacity.”
