As the co-founder of both leadership coaching platform Noria and The Residency, a curated global leadership network for ambitious female founders, Stark brings more than 20 years of experience in integrative health, leadership, and entrepreneurship. She guides entrepreneurs and business owners in launching and running highly impactful organizations, trains coaches in her unique methodology, and facilitates workshops and retreats for some of the world’s biggest brands. With an extensive background in mindfulness training, yogic philosophy, holistic health, and systems-based coaching, Stark has spent her career supporting individuals and organizations shift into greater alignment. Here, she shares how nurturing your personal relationships is one of the most impactful ways you can enhance wellbeing.
What does wellness mean to you?
Reflecting on this question, the first thing that comes to mind is how much my answer has evolved over the years. It feels like both a reflection of my inner experience and a mirror of our collective one.
Right now, wellness—or the feeling of optimal wellbeing—means having a regulated nervous system. A regulated nervous system allows me to stay steady and centered amid uncertainty and the unknown, which, of course, is the nature of life as it unfolds.
For me, regulation comes from the most foundational things. I use that word intentionally, because I believe wellness is really about returning to the basics and quieting the noise of the wellness industry. That looks like getting enough sleep to feel rested, eating nourishing foods, drinking plenty of water, being in intimate and reciprocal relationships, having access to creative inspiration, moving my body, spending time in nature (and unplugging!), and tending to a simple but consistent skincare routine.
What are your favorite things to do to maintain your personal wellbeing?
I want to elaborate on two of the things mentioned above—ones that aren’t universal needs like hydration but that have a significant impact on my personal wellbeing.
Being in meaningful relationships is probably the single most important contributing factor to how I feel. I experience the world through relationships. I love learning about other people’s lived experiences. I value diversity of thought and feeling, and I feel most alive when I’m able to be of service. I invest a lot of time and energy in prioritizing the people I love, making sure they feel heard, seen, and cared for. My family, friends, and community are the steady pulse that keeps me vibrant and grounded.
The second is creative inspiration, as I am an inherently creative person. I value beauty and the ability to be moved by art. I consistently need exposure to artistic expression—whether my own or someone else’s—because it helps me make sense of the world around me.
Whether it’s through dance, an exhibit, an art class, or a stunning piece of literature, I feel most nourished when I’m immersed in creativity. It fills my cup and reconnects me to a deeper sense of meaning and vitality.
What is your favorite healthy food, and do you have a favorite way of preparing it?
I love to cook (yet another creative expression) and feeding people is a way that I show love. As a mom of an eight-month-old baby, I am constantly looking for things to feed him that are nourishing, delicious, and expand his palate. Right now, I am really into Rancho Gordo beans, which I soak overnight and cook in bone broth with bay leaves, cinnamon sticks, or star anise (and plenty of salt!).
What is your greatest wellness achievement?
A major reason I entered the wellness space was because of my own experiences as a highly sensitive person navigating chronic autoimmune illnesses. My greatest wellness achievement is not only learning how to manage flare-ups but also transforming my entire relationship with my body and health over time.
I no longer spiral into intellectual or existential angst when I get sick. Instead, I trust my body’s process. I slow down, let her do what she needs to do, and remember that any moment of dis-ease is ultimately supporting my highest self. I surrender and, in naming that, what greater wellness achievement is there than learning how to let go?
Do you have a secret health or wellness tip you would like to share?
At the start of 2023, I was working closely with my naturopath as I was dealing with long-COVID–like symptoms. One of the most transformative steps we took was testing for heavy metals, followed by a detoxification process called chelation. It wasn’t for the faint of heart. It involved a significant amount of supplementation alongside bi-weekly detox appointments at her office. In full transparency, the process was pretty hellish while I was in it. That said, I got pregnant immediately after completing it and didn’t get sick for two years (daycare has since disrupted that streak).
We live in a world full of toxins—metals, mold, and more. I strongly believe that information alongside critical thinking is power. There are so many tests available that can help you understand what’s happening inside your body, allowing you to create a thoughtful plan for optimal wellbeing with a trusted and trained guide.
What is the best piece of wellness advice you have ever received and from whom?
I’m not entirely sure this counts as wellness advice, but it’s the first thing that comes to mind. Twenty years ago, when I was in graduate school, I had a professor in his early 80s who had lived a long, multi-storied life. He had been an emergency surgeon, a depth psychologist, and a professor in topics like consciousness, spirituality, healing, and the ethics of caring. This man was pure magic, and I still think back on the opportunity to learn from him with awe and admiration.
About halfway through my program, my boyfriend at the time and I were struggling and reached out to him for a couple’s session. During that session, he shared something that has stayed with me: the thing that will break you apart is almost always one of the first things you notice and question. I have found this to be profoundly true. Our bodies and intuition are always keeping score, and when we are in the right relationship with them, they rarely lead us astray.
More often than not, we make excuses for ourselves and others, which is often a form of self-betrayal. The lesson is to pay attention to the signs, signals, and feelings that present themselves early—whether it’s about a relationship, a job, or someone trying to sell you something—and trust that what gives you pause is there for a reason.
What wellness-related books or authors do you recommend, and why?
There are so many incredible wellness-related books and authors. A few that immediately come to mind:
- The Awakened Brain by Lisa Miller
- Anything by The Gottman Institute
- The Way of Integrity by Martha Beck
- Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals by Oliver Burkman
- Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert
What brings you joy?
Over the years, my answer to this question has become increasingly simple. Nothing brings me greater joy than being in the company of people I love, sharing a good home-cooked meal, enjoying one another’s undistracted presence, and filling the space with laughter, warmth, and love.
